Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Love Story

Hello and happy Tuesday!

I promised my little sis Queen Bee Swain a few weeks ago I'd share my perspective on dating, and finding a husband. I don't like to post super long blogs so I'm actually going to write a few posts on what I think works.

1st I wanted to start off talking about my own search in honor of the fact that Husband and I are celebrating our 12 year wedding anniversary this weekend. We are going to a local winery for dinner.  I met husband when I was 24 and just starting off in the "real" world.  A women I worked with, husband was friends with Husband. She had successfully set up 2 other couples that eventually married-I had never been set up before but I took this piece of information as a good sign that I should go for it when asked if she could arrange said set up. Husband was at the tail end of his residency at Wills Eye Hospital-he is an eye surgeon. Being motivated and on time were major criteria as I'd dated the opposite and knew that wouldn't do.

My other rules were- Liked their mother (respect women), Liked animals (kind) and children (good heart).  That was really it. Otherwise I was pretty open. Don't forget not all rules can always apply, but Husband adored his mother, nieces & nephews and planned on getting a dog as soon as he graduated. Check!

My friend explained Husband had messy hair (huh?) and was very out doorsy. No problem, guys like that always like me. I've rocked climbed, lived in Africa, hike, back packed through Europe, was a lift operator in Colorado, ski, water ski, cross country ski, snow shoe, mountain bike, you name it-I can hang.  I prefer spas and Lilly Pulitzer but I can put on a good show, at least during the courting.

We'd both been single for a significant amount of time (me 6 months) and him, I don't really know-but neither of us carried a torch for a past boy/girlfriend.

We had hiccups and growing pains like any other couple (his mother died while we were dating), but by age 25 I was engaged, married at 26, pregnant at 27 and a new mother at 28! I still cherish the first few years with Husband. House hunting, decorating,  making new friends (husband moved me to a small island off Atlantic City and I left the beloved Main Line-something I would only do for him), and building a life together.

So I'll be back with more tomorrow. First thing I'd say is read "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus," by John Gray and "The Rules." They are helpful books. The rest of my advice will be in tomorrows blog.

xoxo

SC

38 comments:

  1. What a fun post! I simply adore hearing how people meet their significant others. Happy early anniversary! :)

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  2. I can't wait to hear more!!Happy Anniversary!

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  3. I LOVE hearing all he juicy stuff, but only when it as a happy ending! Do I need a glass of wine for the next post?

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  4. LOL! No you won't need a glass of wine. It's all good. It will be more advice tomorrow than "my story."
    xoxo
    SC

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  5. What a great story girl! Hope your having a wonderful week! xoxo

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  6. I love it! I also love that you are a good "outdoor" sport. I, too, love skiing and most outdoor activities that were needed during the courting phase! That is excellent advice....don't be a diva. No guy wants to be married to a diva....at least not when he's 20 something!

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  7. This is such a cute story! You were so lucky to have worked with that woman, she has a major talent! Hope you have a great day!

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  8. My friends and I use to quote Men Mars/Women Venus. Retreating to the man cave is my favorite.

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  9. Cute! Can't wait for the rest of the story!

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  10. I agree with "the Rules" novel. Basic stuff but makes sense for a real relationship to last!

    Cute story! I'm older than you but my 6 year annivers. is May 1.

    xoxo,
    Margaret

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  11. I have the same criteria and luckily current bf fits the bill! Loved reading your love story! xx

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  12. YES YES YES to The Rules and Men are From Mars!!!!!! Girls today think they are old fashioned but men havnt changed! And the man we want is the man we will attract with The Rules :O) We will keep him with Men are From Mars :O)

    I am always telling single girls this sort of thing and they always think they know best. And they stay single.

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  13. thank you thank you thank you for the advice!!! i've been single for a few months now and am looking (hence, the how i met your father) to meet someone in the philadelphia area. it's so difficult, i feel!
    i'm looking forward to your dating other posts!

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  14. How fun to have a matchmaker in your court!
    I pretended to LOVE football when D and I were dating.
    The best thing I learned from Mars/Venus was to leave D in his cave when he's in retreat. Brilliant advice!

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  15. Congrats on your anniversary! I've never read Mars/Venus, may have to check it out the next time I'm contemplating what planet my husband is REALLY from lol

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  16. OMG, we have very similar stories! My hubby and I were introduced by a mutual friend. I was 24, he was 32. I was 25 when we got engaged and 26 when we married. Although, I didn't have kiddos until I was 31. Love to hear how couples met. You guys look great together!

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  17. Happy Anniversary!! Meeting through other friends is the best way to meet people. I never turned down a matchmaking friend. Such a cute story. I love how you can be outdoorsy-enough. . . xoxo

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  18. What a cute post, can't wait to hear more!!
    Oh, and lest I forget later-Happy Anniversary!!!

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  19. Love your Love Story! :-) Happy Anniversary! XOXO

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  20. Happy almost anniversary! So fun to read about your love story and I can't wait to hear more.

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  21. Great story.. can't wait for the rest of your advice.

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  22. I really enjoyed reading this - and am looking forward to reading some more!

    (P.S. I have an award for you on my blog!)

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  23. Happy Anniversary! I loved reading this, I really, really value your advice! I can't wait for the next post! xoxo

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  24. Excellent reference books! Happy early anniversary!!! I loved reading about your love story and am lookin' forward to the rest of the story!

    God bless and have a terrific Tuesday!!!

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  25. Awww! I set up two of my sister's friend in September and they're still dating now!

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  26. HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! I love this post. How do ppl make it last? What makes a good match? these are the eternal questions. Those & does my butt look big? :)

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  27. Happy Anniversary! That is SUCH a sweet story so far. :) I met my hubs when we were 8 and 10...started dating at 23/25...engaged 26/28...married at 28/30... and stay tuned! ;)

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  28. My wife said she liked football while we were dating...
    That 1st football season once we were married was ROUGH.
    That was 10 years ago. I'm still trying to teach two little princesses to like football so I can have someone to hang with. Yeah, did I mention they were princesses?

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  29. oh too fun!!! hmm i need to get set up with a doctor!! ha, beth you're too cute :)

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  30. One of Babe's besties is in residency at Wills right now. Incredible program as I am sure you are well aware...XXOO

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  31. You are so right on those two books.

    I've learned that if you don't make a man chase you, the poor thing will never realize he's caught the prize. Yes, they are just that simple-minded. They might be brilliant in every other aspect, but when it comes to women... not so much.

    It's always fun to hear someone's *story*... And, Happy Anniversary!

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  32. Happy Anniversary! Hubby and I will celebrate our 13th this June 7th. I loved reading the story of your courtship. Remind me to write our story when I can FINALLY blog again....btw, may have a chance to be in OCNJ for the summer. I don't want to invite myself over or anything....wink, wink! xo, T

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  33. Happy Anniversary! I love hearing how cute couples met! Oh, and I do consider you and hubby very cute... ;)

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  34. That's a really great story!
    Congrats on 12 years!

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  35. Bloggerprotectionprogram-YOU ARE INVITED! AND I just bought a new house in OC and you can come to OCYC with me! WHEN? I'll call you love. xoxo
    SC

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  36. Saved this for my Sunday morning coffee read, I love that you are a woman who can "hang" I would have never guessed you'd be like that Beth! New respect for you!

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Talk preppy to me! xoxo