Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Preppy Guest Blog #2

Welcome to Preppy Wednesday!

Calling all you sorority girls--enter my giveaway
http://socialclimbers123.blogspot.com/2009/10/preppy-sorority-give-away.html

Today's guest blogger is Southern Living: Preppy Style! She is adorable and if you aren't reading her blog you must immediately!
http://jenniferdtrent.blogspot.com/

Check out her blog for a giveaway of my book!

We met in blog land and if we lived closer I know we'd just hang out and gab far more than our husbands would ever understand. SLPS is warm, wonderful, kind, friendly and albeit a true blue blood--a lovable one (just the way we like them in preppy blog land)!  After reading my novel, Social Climbers, she contacted me to discuss:


"I didn’t discover I was a WASP (on my maternal side) until about 4 years ago.  I had never heard the word, didn’t know what it meant and whenever it was discussed, I went with the flow as if I knew what everyone was talking about.
I am a WASP, I can track my ancestors back to the revolutionary war and England and am a member of the DAR.  I always knew I’d be a member, but never understood its significance.  I’m from a town of approximately 30,000 people in Kentucky.  There is not a “Main Line” as discussed in the book Social Climbers however, there is the “wrong and right side of the (railroad) tracks” (quite literally) and then there is the “UC (upper class) side of the tracks” where I am from.  I lived in the coveted OakTree Hills subdivision, went to a private, co-ed school with uniforms and played the violin.  I have traveled all over the world, went a small liberal arts private college of 900 students (not IVY of course) and now live in South Florida with my WASP husband (where I drove a luxury station-wagon at the age of 24).
 I was not a normal child by any means.  I was not popular (I played an instrument!) but I had my group of friends, including my then best friend Cara, who is also a WASP and our friends from other schools.  Cara dressed like a WASP but did not do anything remotely close to WASP behavior.  She looks the part but didn’t act the part.   This, I now realize, is part of the reason we drifted apart and haven’t spoken in years I also have realized in recent years that all the so-called popular kids in middle and high school were not WASPs, like me and never left to really experience the world.  With my high school friends, I played golf, attempted tennis (with a wooden racket), swam at the country club pool in which we associated, took violin lessons and studied for my private college entrance exams.  I traveled in the summers for music camps housed on college campuses and every February, I stayed in the ritzy Galt House hotel in Louisville for the annual music festival, where I was catered to with fine dining by college music scouts (none of them from my alma mater).  That was the extent of my high school days.    
My parents also do not hold true to the typical WASP behavior, well, in a way.  They are liberal democrats, unlike me.  But now that I think about it, they are very outdoorsy, enjoy the occasional wine and cheese party and have a custom made sailboat that was shipped here from England.  They do not dress WASPy however, they behave WASPy .
My husband and I have one daughter.  We nicknamed her Lallie (pronounced “lolly” like lollipop) and her name comes from her WASP family last and middle names.  She attends a private Montessori school at the age of two.  I had her birth announced in my alma mater’s monthly alumni newsletter, announced it in all the newspapers in which we’re associated and mailed out professional birth announcements to all our friends and family.  Her first birthday party included a guest list of over 75 people and she already has an assignment for etiquette school when she turns four-years old.  She is pure-bred WASP. 
I started reading Social Climbers a few days ago.  I’m about 60 pages along in the book.  *****
The other day, my husband was out playing golf in a tournament.  I am a working-mom, so I arrived home prior to picking up Lallie from school and was asked if I would like to join him and some other friends and wives at the clubhouse for drinks and appetizers (the country club in which we live).  I was wearing typical golf attire, a Lilly skort, Lilly polo top, a gingham pink sun visor, sunglasses, carrying my un-marked Coach bag and my Steven Bononnos, monogrammed none the less.  Husband brought me a glass of wine and I played socialite by talking with the mayor, a commissioner and a few other town big-wigs (I work in commercial real estate and my husband is an engineer, so we know our fair share of UC’s).  During a lull in conversation, I looked around and saw my wine glass, teetering in my hand near my lips, that’s always how I hold my wine glass (sometimes with my arms slightly cross with my elbow resting on my other hand)I reviewed my outfit, looked around at the women who had come to me to say hello (not me to them) and make the double kiss-of-cheeks.  I notice my bag was checked, my husband brought me my drinks.  I realized right then and there, that I am a Social Climber myself.
This is very interesting to me.  I have never been the preppy type.  I was in behavior, just not dress.  Think of it this way:  My friend Cara, looked the part, but didn’t behave the part, I was the complete opposite – I behaved the part, but didn’t look the part.  I never dressed preppy until about 3 years ago, when I became pregnant with my daughter.  I started researching websites for adorable nursery items, tracked myself into other preppy websites and have since become a preppy dresser.  I make grosgrain ribbon topiaries (all preps must make something), I am involved in the DAR, Junior League and possibly my college sorority alumni.  I became involved in these not only because I want to “do good” but because I wanted to meet people and be social. 
I am a social climber (in some sense, as I’m not northeastern and didn’t do the Ivy League thing – but you know what I mean).  For the first time in my life, I am the most comfortable I’ve ever been, in my own skin and that to me, is a very good thing! 
~~~I found out later after writing this, after speaking with Beth Dunn and actually finishing the book, that I am not a Social Climber.  I have Social Status (if you need definitions, READ THE BOOK!)  The difference between myself and a Social Climber is basically this: I want to have fun, do “good” and socialize with good people, without stepping on the toes of others for the mere gain of social status.  I’m not in it for the status (I already have it) and I’m not a b*&#h (I hope!).  I’m in it for the fun and frankly, I can’t help how I was raised….as they all say “It is what it is!”****

Xoxo
Jennifer"

See! Isn't she just pure through and through?? And so honest. The thing I love most is that she is so content and happy being herself. How many of us would love to say the same thing!
















I hope everyone has a beautiful day! I'm off to my local Lilly Pulitzer store which is gasp....closing! Devastation.

xoxo

SC

34 comments:

  1. Amen sista! And ditto on the not wanting to step on the toes of others. I have social status that is well deserved because I didn't have to work at it to get there.

    There is a certain comfort in dressing preppy. Besides, you're always ready to play a round of golf without a fuss.

    I once read that Albert Einstein bought oodles of the same items of clothing so that he wouldn't have to waste time on making decisions about what to wear. Looking into my own closet, I realize that I've unwittingly done the same thing with skorts and polos that I play golf in. So basically, dressing preppy has simplified my life.

    That can't be a bad thing. Ever.

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  2. What a great guest post! Very insightful, and Jennifer and her daughter are beautiful.
    I went to school w/major preps in the Midwest and the best preppies are those who really don't care about status, their heart is in the correct and right place where kindness rules.

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  3. She is darling, and so fun to read a little more about her, and how she discovered her WASP roots!!

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  4. I love SLPS's blog! Great pick for preppy guest blogger!!!!!

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  5. What a fun post! I'm definitely heading over to her blog now.

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  6. Enjoyed todays post! CHEERS! Michele

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  7. Love that she is so comfortable in her own skin! Amazing... and so is your blog! :)

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  8. I love how real and comfortable she is with herself. Great post.

    Ya'll have a pretty preppy day!!!
    God bless Ya'

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  9. Having raised 5 real preppies from Wellesley, MA, who have gone to the most prestigeous prep schools and colleges in the country, I can tell you one thing. They would never be so crass as to talk and exhibit themselves the way you do, nor would they ever allow their children to be so exposed in garbage literature. Our family dates back to one of the original boats landing at Plymouth. I have only one phrase to share with you, my dear, what you are doing is, "just not the done thing," or JNDT. A true preppie is quietly understated, not a braggart nor a snob, and prides themselves on being genuine socially. Manners matter...it's the Old School, you know.

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  10. Your blog is so refreshingly entertaining, so nice to browse too!

    Secretia

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  11. I'm also entertained! Cheers for Wednesday!!! :)

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  12. I'd like to comment on my own post and to commenter Deborah at Lavender Rose Ramblings. Thank you for not being anonymous and sharing your thoughts as it is your right.
    However, your need to list your resume of credentials:
    "Real preppies" (what is that?)
    "Wellesley, MA" (you could have a po box there)
    "The "most" prestigious prep schools and colleges in the country" (who cares)
    Oh yeah and my favorite--"your family dates backs to the original boats" (they could have been the maids/servants).
    Contradicts your post. You felt the need to "exhibit" yourself exactly that way.
    To this I say...The preppy blog world is warm, friendly and supportive. Stooping to make such a cruel comment makes you "CRASS." Don't bother to come back--we don't want your comments or snobbery! NOCD--Not our class dear.

    xoxo

    SC

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  13. Being content and happy with yourself and your life is what makes life worth living!

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  14. Dear Debra/Lavender Rose,

    I consider myself an old school, prep school prep. Grew in Manhattan, went to all the right schools, traveled and educated abroad... labels and talking about finances were strictly taboo. I'm a good bit like you in my thinking.

    However, there are many different types of preppies.

    And, Beth is having fun. And that is what this blog is about. She isn't taking this too seriously, nor is she taking herself too seriously. She is not poking fun at anyone (other than herself at times) nor is she hurting anyone.

    While you may not agree with some/all/any of what Beth has to say, she is entertaining hundreds of readers who truly enjoy this blog. Don't ruin her fun, please. I like being able to laugh with her, at her and myself!

    I also wanted to add that I have found the preppy blog world to be a completely warm, embracing, sympathetic and encouraging place. I had a health scare a few weeks back. It was a terribly frightening couple of weeks for me. I blogged about my thoughts and fears as openly and passionately as it helped me sort out my emotions. I had no idea there were so many wonderful, wonderful Preppy girls out there. Without them I would have been a wreck.

    So whatever preppy may be... preppy does differ and my preppy girls were there for me, including Beth.

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  15. Thank you Entertaining mom! And thank you Beth...you help keep "this" fun! xoxo

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  16. Here's the thing about preppies or really any other group anyone wants to put themselves into. By doing all these interviews gushing about so and so or whoever, you are singling people out therefore making it snobby and exclusive.

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  17. I can't believe your Lilly store is closing! That is awful.
    I'm so sad I'm out of college! My sorority would have loved this! :o) I will be sure to pass along the word! ;o)

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  18. I like it! Interesting perspective on the whole thing. I am a So Cal girl and I would say grew up mainly around surfer types (although I am not one), so I am very intrigued.

    Holly

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  19. The world is too full of real dangers for us to start inventing them here. A little politeness never hurts anyone.

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  20. WOW!
    First let me say I adore SLPS. Thanks for highlighting her.
    Secondly, I am appalled by the hateful comments. They don't realize this just for fun.
    There is no harm or snobbery in showcasing other preppy bloggers. Other blog communities do it too, and its great to find bloggers you may not find otherwise.
    Keep up the good work! I love reading your blog.

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  21. There always seems to be a spoilsport who likes raining on others' parades. It just boils down to being a mean person, which you, my dear, are not. Nor am I, which is why people like this are able to get to us. We care about making others happy, not making them feel badly. That is what makes us genteel, not the fact that our ancestors were on one of the original boats at Plymouth...

    JMHO ;-)

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  22. I love reading your blog but I'm a little confused.... I just don't understand..and please do not take this rudely.
    Do you have to be rich to be preppy?
    Do you have to be able to trace your ancestors make to the roots of America?
    Do you have to be in a sorority or go to boarding school? I'm just not sure how exlusive this is getting!

    What about regular people-- who just love the preppy look (khaki pants, pink and green and pearls!) at the things about it like the manners and traditions? What is we weren't even raised that way? Are we considered not good enough because we don't have status or funds?
    Can I not be preppy because my mother wasn't preppy?

    Please help me understand. Again I hope you don't interpret this as a 'mean' or 'hater' comment-- this is just a confused one!

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  23. Please excuse the typos!

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  24. Dear Confused,

    Preppy is a way of thinking and being... it is a lifestyle and a way of dress...

    It is not a "cult" or "group" nor is it exclusionary. It's just a way.

    I actually consider myself to be more of a classic girl (and preppy falls into that category) and there are different types of preps around the country. West Coast varies from the Southern which varies from the New England.

    As different as they (we) all are, we embrace everyone. We just love to live a good life and have fun. I happen to love Lacoste and wear Lilly in the summertime. In New England Wintertime it's jeans, corduroys and lots of sweaters!

    Preppy is an attitude of pride and self confidence. Preppy is an upbringing, to some extent.

    I believe one can be preppy even though one's parents aren't. You also do not need to be a WASP to be preppy. My parents are Jewish and though they would never dare admit it preppy to a fault.

    I have a friend who is preppy with a Capital P but doesn't have an enormous bank account by any means, hell, neither do I!!!!

    Preppy does have to do with traditions and manners and proper upbringing but not in a snobby manner. I have (and have had) many sublimely rich friends who are anything but preppy! Preppies, for the most part, are not terribly showy. Though preppies do love to shop.

    Here, from Wikipedia... pretty much sums it up!
    Preppy, also spelled preppie, is a shortened version of the word preparatory. It is a chiefly North American adjective or noun traditionally used in relation to northeastern private university-preparatory schools, as well as those who attend Ivy League or other prestigious colonial era colleges and universities. The term is used to denote a person seen as characteristic of an attendee of these schools.[1] Characteristics of preppies include a particular subcultural speech, vocabulary, accent, dress, mannerisms, and etiquette.

    The word is particularly well-known amongst American teenagers, as it is quite often used to refer to a particular subculture present within most populous American high schools: the traditionally "popular kids", generally consisting of the children of middle to upper class families, typically characterized (especially by Hollywood in films such as "Never Been Kissed", "She's All That", etc.) as a shallow, transparent group, who are primarily concerned with extrinsic things, the three most obvious of which are probably popularity (generally within their own high school), physical appearance and material possessions. Although, when used in this sense, the word is considered slightly more "slang-ish".

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  25. Dearest confused preppy

    You are so right. It is just loving the prep life, no money or private schools needed. You are a dear to ask and not a hater at all! You are a lovely preppy and please keep reading an enjoying. I'm not exclusive--I'm the opposite. I'm inclusive. I was in a sorority but that is not what makes me love preppy. I just love khakis, and anything with an animal on it! xoxo

    SC

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  26. I really feel I should chime in here as well. When I wrote to Beth, it was actually in confidence however, she had asked me to guest blog because she understood me. I figured that since she had been doing exerts from the Preppy Handbook, that everyone would understand my take.

    I am not rich by any means, most of my Lilly comes from Ebay, my daughter wears Walmart clothes to school (for staining) and I would never have gone to a private college without a scholarship. I'm a good person, I try to give back to the community where and when I can and most of all, I'm a full-time working mom.

    This essay was merely my life, from the preppy point of view, and how I discovered that I was a WASP and by behavior, a prep.

    As discussed, it's more of a mind-set. I write thank you cards to every single person that gives me a gift, I was taught this by my mother. I send announcements to my alma mater because that's what everyone else did. We named our daughter as such because we liked the name and it's close to our hearts because it's family.

    Most of all, these blogs, preppy or not, are all about fun. These women are people you can count on to pray and be there for you when you need it. These "prepsters" if you want to classify us that way, are wonderful, caring people who email when they know you are hurting, send smiles on great days and cards for your birthday.

    I hope this helps Miss Confused and thank you for asking. You are not a hater, and it's great for us to have the opportunity to explain things rather than take one single post and assume one knows everything about a person. Have a fantastic weekend!

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  27. Ya know, I didn't really "get" that there was an entire preppy blog community. I just thought beth was fun to read and I like her silliness. (Beth hunny, I like your fun and silliness!) Doesn't seem all that elite to me over here, and I'm about as far away from 'prep' as you can get...

    Down with haters and- Deborah, you're the one who sounds like a snob with no class. You give preps a bad name.

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  28. No-longer confused preppy!October 30, 2009 at 7:18 PM

    Thank you so much for the kind clarification!
    I feel a lot better! :)

    I am relatively new to the prep style and lifestyle but I love it and feel its the best! Preppy to be is like a state of mind and a sort of simplicity. I am a teenager and have come to strongly dislike "teenage looks" clothing...the overdone makeup, trendy clothing etc. I just belief in looking nice. And simple, really. I own 2 lilly items that I got for huge deals. I am on the lookout for more Lilly at my local consignments. Other than that I just wear normal clothing- jeans, cable knit sweaters, and loafers. Pearls as well. Summer is when I am my preppiest-- I love the sunshine and would much rather be in a dress and strappy sandals than a sweater any day! "Preppy" for me is about conservative cute looks, trying my hardest to be gracious and a lady, big sunglasses, stationary and always trying to look and be my best!
    It doesn't really matter where the clothing I wear is from (I wear target!) but it does matter the style and quality.
    I'm a "beginner prep" so I have a long ways to go but hey "it's not the destination, it's the journey!"
    XOXOXO

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  29. No longer confused prepOctober 30, 2009 at 7:22 PM

    To Southern Living: Preppy Style

    I love your daughters name! My best friend and family call me "lolly" and I really like it. I have even had someone thing it was my real name! I think it's super cute!

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  30. Ah "no longer confused" you are too sweet! You already have a "preppy" name! LOL! I'm glad you're no longer confused and welcome to the group! LOL!!!

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  31. OM gosh no longer confused! You are so me when I was your age! Marshalls and TG Max sometimes have great deals on Vineyard Vines, Lilly and Ralph Lauren. Also look on Ebay my friends and I get a lot of our clothes from there. Your local library might have a copy of The Official Preppy Handbook and my novel has a how to guide--Social Climber (ask your library). Best of luck finding your style and collecting your wardrobe. Welcome to the preppy world! oxox

    SC

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  32. Am I the only person that didn't think that Lavendar (or whatever her name is) wasn't being mean? I think she was just making a statement. Beth, no offense, because the few times I've passed through here, I think you've got a really cute blog. But I feel like you're over reacting on this. I have read and re-read this and I just don't think she was being mean. She probably just shouldn't have said anything at all, true. But honestly, for the most part, I believe you've over reacted on this.

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  33. t was preeti good site then other when i visited last month
    and got good information about online business


    part time job

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Talk preppy to me! xoxo